It has been almost a year to the day from my first experience working with Witalij Martynow and his unique approach to breathwork. You can read my first review from last year where my eyes were really opened to the power of your breath and this intelligence that lives within all of us.
Who Is Witalij Martynow?
To understand the experience I believe it’s important to understand the facilitator and the experience he guided us through. A former professional basketball player from Poland, Witalij struggled with a multitude of physical and mental health issues which after beginning plant medicine work, specifically Ayahuasca, took his life in a new direction. He left a lucrative profession to begin practicing his own unique version of breathwork with the intention of healing and serving others from past trauma.
He promotes his work as 10 years of psychotherapy in a single session. There’s a lot to unpack in that statement but I would agree that this is true with the appropriate intention and integration before and after.
What’s Different From A Year Ago?
I was taken back by the size and scale of what previously was an intimate 20 person session packed into a tiny dance hall in Ocean Beach, San Diego. Last night was easily 150 plus people spread across a large open room almost shoulder to shoulder. Witalij has gotten popular it seems. Besides that, the formula was very much the same. One thing I admire about how Witalij runs these workshops is that he treats them very much the same way as the Ayahuasca ceremonies he helps facilitate. He is a guide, a facilitator, and is incredibly proficient at creating a space and mindset that is conducive to the work we were all about to do.
For a very large man he has a softness to him that is both inviting and comforting. He is clear from the get go what he is and what he isn’t. What I love about how we sets the stage for what we are about to do is that he puts the responsibility on you, the individual, and your dedication and commitment both to the work, the intention, and the ability to surrender and let go. I love this because as I continue on my own journey this feeling of personal accountability is at the core of my spiritual and personal growth and so I love that this setting is no different.
My Intention and Mindset
In my initial session I had never been introduced to breathwork and to be honest didn’t truly understand what it was that I was showing up for. That impacted the experience and while I was still blown away with what occurred in my body by pushing it this way I didn’t have any incredible insights or revelations. Long story short, I did not prepare.
This time around I’ve had a year to read and understand many different types and functions of breath work. A book I highly recommend entitled, Breath by James Nestor, is a great inside look at the science behind breath and how we have an incredibly powerful tool baked into our biology that’s just waiting to get used.
The miracle of our breath and it’s incredible healing qualities is something I overlooked for most of my life. It’s a tool for so many aspects of our mind body connection and truly has the power to heal. When signing up for this most recent event I was prepared better for the work that would be involved.
Like the medicinal use of psychedelics there is an incredibly important element of set and settings that impact the effectiveness of the treatment. If you want the most out of the experience you have to give yourself over to it. You have to understand what you are walking into and give it your all. It’s not easy. Witalij is an incredible facilitator and keeps you moving through the “chapters” of the session but it’s really about how much you give yourself to the experience that determines the results (from my experience anyway).
This means pushing through the moments you feel you’ll pass out, or your fingers curl, arms go numb, and feet start to ball up. I knew what to expect this time and I was ready to give it my all. My intention wasn’t specific. It did not target a specific event or trauma I was looking to heal. I am moving into a new chapter in my life and in my sobriety and wanted my intention to really be to come to terms with some aspects of my life I’ve been unable to accept. I wanted to also check in on myself. Much like psychedelic use this type of breathwork has the capacity to turn off our inner critic, our thinking mind. It allows me to see myself and my world through a much more objective lens and ultimately points out a ton of areas where I am unnecessarily beating myself up or judging myself and others negatively.
About Last Night…
As we entered into the venue and everyone was laying out their mats, blankets, and pillows out I chatted with some of my new neighbors and we shared past experiences, anticipation of what we were about to do, and generally just hung out for a bit. As we all laid down and Witalij began I covered my eyes and put my blanket up to my neck as I laid flat on my yoga mat. The music and instruction are really intense and got my mindset ready to really push.
The first few sections of hard intense breathing had me fighting with myself whether to pull off, pass out, or keep going. The answer is to always keep going. Witalij cools it off right before you think you’re about to lose it. I continued to push and give it my all focusing only on my breath and clearing my head of all the other judging thoughts that were flowing in.
At some point, the timeline began to get a little fuzzy, I began to detach from where I was physically and I was going deeper internally. I started seeing the faces of people in my life and many of them were the faces of those I have either unresolved issues with or have personal judgements against. They were flowing towards me one after the other really fast and as they did I had this realization that fell over me. It was two fold, it was that the people that have hurt me the most have actually done the most for me and I could see all of these people just trying their best too. The judgements I often have surround feelings of either me being wronged, not listened to, or dismissed. That’s where my resentments come from and that’s where my anger and suffering typically lie.
I know this is weird and doesn’t fully make sense but by breathing this way I now was detached from that judging part of my mind. I was looking at these faces as they swirled around and could see them objectively. Not intentionally doing anything to me but just following their own path unconscious to what I interpreted as a number of attacks towards me. They were just beings finding their own way in this world. I also got to look at my own judgements towards myself. The pressure I put on myself to do everything perfect and the judgements about maybe how I’ve treated others. I got to look at me and just say, “you’re ok. You’re on the right path. You are human”. I want to hold that space forever. It’s a recognition that I am on the right path and that the decisions I’m making to change my life are hard, they come with a lot of failure, but are always trending up. I want to be clear, it’s difficult to put the experience into words and so this is my best attempt at what happened while immersed in the session. It was more a feeling of “knowing” intuitively.
The Settling & My Review
As the session came to a close I was drenched in sweat, I was exhausted, I was at peace. It was a feeling I wanted to hold onto. I could have stayed laying in that venue for hours if I could but ultimately had to leave. As I continue to process what occurred last night I have a new found respect and admiration for breathwork as a whole and Witalij and his unique practice.
From the last workshop to this one the price has increased significantly but I do hope that is not a deterrent. Partially by paying over $100 for a spot I felt much more inclined not just to show up but to give it my absolute all. The size of the group has grown significantly and I have to admit I was a little put off when I arrived because of how intimate the first one was. I honestly was a bit concerned that the money being made was becoming more important than the work being done. Again, my judgement. In retrospect the size of the crowd did something more powerful than the first. The shared experience with such a large number of energy bodies in the same room actually enhanced my experience. I was in my own experience but could feel the support and camaraderie of the collective.
I’m excited to continue my integration from last night’s experience and continue to uncover insights from what transpired. I respect and appreciate the opportunity to be a part of this and I will absolutely be joining again in the future!
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